Motivation

I have found myself tonight looking at every video that I've posted onto my youtube account and reading every journal entry that I've posted onto this blog......why?

Because I need motivation! LOL

I'm at the point now where I just want to quit. I'm on day 24 and day 60 seems so far off. I try to remind myself that I've made it 24 days thus far and that is an accomplishment but mentally and physically I'm tired. I have never known a feeling like this...what happened to all of the energy that I had when I first began the program???? I' find myself back to plenty of sleepless nights..........not because I'm up with so much to do but because after my workouts my muscles throb and hurt so much that I find myself laying in bed, in pain, in tears waiting to drift off to sleep. That usually happens at around 11 or 12 and thus I wake up at 6 or 7 in a bad mood, mad at the world, mad at me, and ready to give up.

I will pat myself on the back for the following reason...I havent given up yet! But I cant say that its been easy. Even as I type this my eyes fill up with tears. THIS IS HARD!

If I couldn't count being a mother, I'd easily say this is the hardest thing that I've ever had to do. :0( And because of all of the feelings that I've been experiencing somehow someway I've lost track of "why" I started this plan to begin with. I've lost focus....its become solely about the weight loss and I never wanted it to be that way. This was suppose to be a full journey....it was suppose to be FUN! What happened?

I'm trying to stay focused on the goal at hand....36 more days! I can do this. Right? Right? Somebody please tell me I can do this lol

1Love
KL